Chasing the Tail with Bipolar Disorder
Published: Sun, 07/11/10
Hi ,
How's it going?
I hope you're doing well today.
You know I have a goddaughter, right?
I know, because I talk about her all
the time, right?
Well, she's two-and-a-half years old now.
And cute as a button (I have to say that,
she's my goddaughter!) LOL
Well, she has this dog.
I don't know if every little two-and-a-half
year old little girl has a dog, but she does.
You would think it would be like a
poodle, or another "girlie" type dog.
But noooo...
My goddaughter has to have a bulldog!
I figure most little girls just brush their
dog's hair, pet them, try to dress them up,
whatever, right?
Try dressing up a bulldog!
Well, her favorite thing is chasing this dog
around and trying to grab its tail.
That's all she wants to do with it is grab
its tail and pull it!
Well, needless to say, this doesn't go over
too well with the dog!
It reminds me of people.
Nobody likes their "tail being pulled."
In other words, nobody likes being told
what to do.
Especially when it comes to bipolar disorder.
In my courses/systems, I teach the supporter
that there are some things over which you
have control, and some things over which
you do not have control, and that your loved
one is something over which you do not have
control.
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I know you care about your loved one
or you wouldn't be their supporter.
And you want them to get better.
Of course you do.
Sometimes to the point of wanting to
tell them what to do.
For some people, that's just natural.
But it can lead to problems in the
relationship.
Just like with my goddaughter and her
dog.
Nobody likes being told what to do.
You've heard the expression, "You can
lead a horse to water, but you can't make
them drink."
Well, I heard it put this way:
"You can lead a horse to water, but you
can't make them drink. But you can make
their food salty enough so that they get
mighty thirsty!"
In other words, instead of trying to make
your loved one do something...
Try to get them to WANT to do it for
themselves.
Or, to go even further...
Let them think it's THEIR idea!
For example, think about the leading the
horse to water by making the food salty
idea.
If you've been having problems getting
your loved one to go to see their doctor
or psychiatrist...
What about this idea?
The next time they have to go, suggest
that you go together, so that afterwards
you can go out to eat at their favorite
restaurant!
It doesn't take the sting out of going to
the appointment, but it sure makes the
idea more appealing, doesn't it?
You can do the same thing with taking
their medication.
If you've been having a hard time getting
your loved one to take their medication...
Try suggesting that if they take their
medication as prescribed, regularly, for
a whole week, (and can prove it to you),
you'll take them out shopping and they
can buy a special something they've been
wanting, or whatever they want.
They may not want to take their medication,
but they may be willing to do it for that
special shopping trip!
What are some other ideas you can come
up with to "make the food salty" for your
loved one so they will want to "drink the
water?"
What have you done in the past to get your
loved one to do what they didn't want to do?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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