Bipolar Supporter – In Spite Of
Published: Wed, 12/28/11
Hi ,
How are you feeling today?
I hope you're feeling fine.
You know, they say that there are two kinds
of people in the world:
Those that look at the glass as half empty...
And those that look at the glass as half full.
Those that see the glass as half empty are said
to be pessimists.
And those that see the glass as half full are said
to be optimists.
Then they say that there are those that just see a
glass of water.
Those, they say, are realists.
If, given a choice, which would you be?
Which would you say you are?
Nobody likes to be a pessimist, but unfortunately,
some people are anyway.
Those are the people that most people like to avoid,
because nobody likes being around someone who is
negative all the time.
It's better to be an optimist, with a positive attitude.
Even in my main course and resource, I talk about how
it's good to have a positive attitude when you're dealing
with a loved one with bipolar disorder:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
Because there is already enough negativity that you
have to deal with.
And many times that negativity is coming from your
loved one themselves.
For example:
Many people with bipolar disorder will claim that
you are being unfair to them (usually when they are in
an episode and you do something like take away the
money).
Or they will say that life isn't fair to them (usually
when they're feeling depressed).
They will blame everything and everyone else for their
problems.
They just won't take responsibility for their own
problems.
That's a big issue with many people who suffer from
bipolar disorder when they are unstable.
And especially a big issue for their supporters, because
they are usually the ones who are getting the blame.
So it may be hard for you to be an optimist in light of
that issue.
Sometimes it may be very difficult for you to be
positive in light of all the negativity surrounding you.
I can understand that.
When my mom was going through her worst bipolar
episode ever and was screaming things at me like,
"I hate you and I don't want you to be my son any
more," I was so hurt.
I wondered how I could possibly stay positive in the
light of such hurtful things.
But then I thought of it this way:
My mom was very sick...
But things (and my mom) would get better.
Those two ideas kept me going.
And they helped me to keep a positive attitude IN
SPITE OF the things I had going against me.
It didn't mean that I wasn't being realistic.
Not at all.
I still faced the opposition against me.
I dealt with the problems I was up against.
I still helped my mom deal with her issues, like
the way things were financially because of when
she had gone manic and gotten so out of control.
So it wasn't that I wasn't realistic.
But I was optimistic.
I still held onto the idea that things would get better,
IN SPITE OF...
That's what kept me going.
That idea of IN SPITE OF.
In spite of the fact that my mom was sick, she was
eventually going to get better.
In spite of the way things looked at the time, I still
believed that they would eventually get better.
In spite of the fact that my mom had bipolar disorder,
I still believed that with the right treatment, she would
improve and eventually recover.
In spite of the things she was yelling and screaming
at me at the time and how hurtful they were, I still
believed that she ultimately didn't know what she
was saying and didn't mean them, so I was able to
forgive her.
In spite of the negative things I was feeling, I was
still able to be optimistic.
See what I mean?
If you can rise above things...
If you can hold onto the positive IN SPITE OF the
negative...
You can be an optimist too.
Then you will be able to handle things so much
better.
Of course, like me, you will still need to be a realist
as well.
Some things you can't ignore.
You will still need to talk to your loved one about
behavior that bothers you, for example.
But IN SPITE OF things they do that bother you,
you can still love them and be supportive of their
efforts to get better IN SPITE OF their bipolar
disorder.
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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