Bipolar: The Blame Game
Published: Tue, 11/13/12
Hi ,
How's it going for you today?
I hope it's a good day for you.
Have you ever known a real complainer?
The type of person who has nothing good to
say about anyone or anything?
Who couldn't get along with anyone?
(or at least not for very long, before they became
critical of them)
Who would say things like, "Life isn't fair."
Or that someone else wasn't fair to them, or they
were in an unfair situation.
Someone who always blamed everyone else or
everything else for what was going on with them.
Who had a lot of unsolved problems?
Did it seem to you that they might be their own
biggest problem?
I know of someone like that.
Someone told me about this girl.
Now, I'm not a doctor, and I can't diagnose anyone,
but in my opinion, this girl showed every sign of having
bipolar disorder.
She had terrible mood swings, for one thing, and
that was obvious, even to someone who didn't know
anything about bipolar disorder.
She called her sister once to complain about her
boyfriend.
At first she talked like she really loved him, but
the next minute she was blaming him for all her
problems.
Not just that, but she keeps getting into trouble in
all aspects of her life -
Her family, friends, co-workers, etc. - she has
conflicts with them all.
They think there is something wrong with her, but she
denies it, blaming everything on them.
But think about it.
Do you think everyone else is wrong and that she is
the only one who is right?
It usually doesn't work like that.
If that's the case, if everyone else is saying the same
thing, she should stop and listen to them.
They can't all be wrong.
Maybe they don't know if she has bipolar disorder or
not, but they do know that something is wrong with
her.
Otherwise she wouldn't have all the problems that
she has.
But she is in denial, for sure, and playing the Blame
Game.
In my courses/systems, I talk about denial and what
you can do about it:
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You may have faced this with your loved one, at
least in the beginning.
Many people with bipolar disorder will be in denial
when they're first diagnosed.
They would rather blame someone or something else
instead of accepting their diagnosis.
Like they would say it's just stress from work that's
making them act this way.
Or, if it weren't for [whoever], I wouldn't act this way.
That's blaming, and it NEVER helps someone with
bipolar disorder to get better.
In order to get better, you have to stop blaming other
people and other things for your own problems.
If you are having conflicts with most of the other
people in your life, you have to consider that the problem
is YOU, and not them.
You can't change anyone else, but you can change
yourself.
If you or your loved one are already on medication, but
you're still having too many problems, you may need
a medication adjustment.
If you suspect this is the case, then you need to contact
your or your loved one's doctor.
You may not have even been noticing these things about
yourself, but other people have been pointing them out
to you.
If so, you probably need help, because they can't all be
wrong and you be right.
Just something to consider.
What do you think?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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