Bipolar: Accept What You Cannot Change
Published: Fri, 08/30/13
Hi ,
How are things going for you today?
I hope you're having a great day.
Remember what is commonly called the Serenity
Prayer?
"God grant me the serenity to accept
the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference."
Well, today I want to talk about the "accept the things
I cannot change" part.
That's important when it comes to coping and dealing
with bipolar disorder.
It's trying to change the things you CAN'T change that
leads to stress and anxiety, and that's what's bad when it
comes to bipolar disorder.
Stress leads to depression, and sometimes physical
problems as well, even fatal ones.
In someone with bipolar disorder, stress can lead to a
bipolar episode.
And avoiding episodes are what my courses/systems are
all about:
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There are some things you CAN change, but there are
other things you CAN'T change.
You can't change other people.
It's up to them to change themselves.
And that's only if they want to - you can't do it for
them.
You can't always change the situation around you
(although sometimes you can, and I'll talk about that
in a minute).
You can't change the world, as much as you might like to
sometimes.
You can't change the place you're in, usually.
Especially in this economy.
Most of us are lucky to be holding on to our homes these
days, and couldn't afford another house even if we wanted
to.
You can't change things.
Things just are the way they are.
For example, you just can't change the fact that your loved
one has bipolar disorder.
It's just a fact.
You may not like it, but you also can't change it.
The only thing you can do about things you can't change is
to accept them.
A friend of mine told me this quote from one of her daily
readings, and I think it applies here:
"Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When
I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing,
or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I
can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or
situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this
moment."
I think that's what it's all about.
Finding serenity, or peace of mind, in whatever situation you're
in right now.
In other words, accepting what you can't change.
If you can come to the place where you can accept that
your loved one has bipolar disorder and you can't change
that fact, then you can do something about it -
You can start learning how to cope with it.
Remember the old expression, "If life gives you lemons,
make lemonade."
Well, this is sort of the same thing.
You can work with what you have, if you accept it.
If you don't, it won't get you anywhere, anyway.
And it might make you sicker, trying to change what you
can't change, getting all stressed out and, like I said, getting
stressed out can lead to depression and other things.
And that is something you DON'T want!
For supporters, you won't go into an episode like your
loved one with bipolar disorder might, but the stress can
make you not as good a supporter as you can be, if you
don't accept the things you can't change.
The main point I'm trying to make is to accept the things
you can't change, and work with the things you CAN change,
and you'll be much more able to manage your loved one's
bipolar disorder, and to be a better supporter.
What do you think?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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