Bipolar: Getting What You Want
Published: Mon, 04/07/14
Hi ,
How's your day going for you today?
I hope it's going very well.
Remember when you were younger, and you
wanted something so bad you almost couldn't
stand it?
Like at Christmastime, getting that one present
you wanted more than anything else.
Then, as you get older, you may have the same
strong desire for something, but you can't always
count on someone else providing it for you.
Some things you just have to do for yourself.
When you know what you want, and you want it
badly enough, well, you'll find a way to get it.
That's what happens when you're an adult.
No more Santa Clause.
Just you.
And your ability to attain what you desire.
First, though, you need to know what you want.
So how does this relate to bipolar disorder?
(Because you know I always relate everything to
bipolar disorder somehow, right? Lol)
Say you want things to be less stressful at home.
Say you want it very badly.
Well, no one is going to do the work for you - you
first of all have to want it bad enough, and
second of all, want it bad enough to do what it
takes to attain it.
So you might think of ways to make your home
environment more peaceful.
You might brainstorm some ideas and then act
upon them.
You can't just wait on your loved one to do it for
you, because they may either not see the same need,
or acknowledge it, or be willing or able to do it like
you can.
I know, that sounds like it's all on you to do the hard
work...
But sometimes you have to pick up the slack from your
loved one.
That is, if it's something you want bad enough.
Again, if you want something bad enough, you'll do
whatever it takes to get it.
In my courses/systems, I talk about this in relation
to stability:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
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If your loved one wants stability bad enough,
they will do whatever it takes to attain it.
And that may be what you want as well.
Although you can't make your loved one do
what they have to do to attain stability...
You can do your part.
You can help them remember to take their
medications.
You can see that they get to all their doctor and
therapist appointments.
You can make sure that they stay productive,
even if that means writing up a To-Do List
for them.
You can go to your own support group and
find out how other supporters are dealing with
their loved one's bipolar disorder.
In other words, if you want something bad
enough, you'll do what it takes to get it.
That doesn't mean, though, that you can't ask
for help.
In fact, if you don't ask for help, you may suffer
supporter burnout, trying to do everything
yourself.
On the other hand, you don't want to do for your
loved one what they can do for themselves, either.
You have every right to expect them to participate
in what they can.
Like the example I used of keeping a stress-free
home environment.
They can help with that, too.
Or coming up with ideas for items to put on a
To-Do List.
Or helping with a list of long-term goals that
both of you want to achieve.
What do you think?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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