Bipolar: Don’t Stop Talking
Published: Sat, 05/10/14
Hi,
How are you doing today?
Are you having a good day?
I hope so.
Some friends of mine just had a new baby.
It's amazing how quickly and how tremendously
their lives have drastically changed!
They're really struggling with trying to figure this
new parent thing out.
Like what to do when the baby cries (it seems to
cry for so many reasons).
Maybe you've had children, and you remember
when they were babies (or you have a baby now)...
And you remember how they would cry...
And you'd have to try to figure out what they
were crying about...
Did they need their diaper changed?
Did they need to be fed?
Did they need to be held?
Did they need their pacifier?
Did they need something else?
The point is, the only way that a baby has to
communicate is through crying.
But we learn, as an adult, that we have to
communicate through words if we're going to
get our point across.
In other words, you can't expect your loved
one to know what you're thinking or feeling
if you just shut down and stop communicating.
Even in my courses/systems, I talk about how
important it is to keep the lines of communication
open with your loved one who has bipolar disorder:
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
Communication is one of the most important
things there is in a relationship.
Especially when you're trying to deal with bipolar
disorder.
So why do supporters stop talking to their loved
ones with bipolar disorder?
Well, usually it has to do with fear.
Fear that they will make their loved one worse.
Fear that it will start a fight.
Fear that they won't be understood.
Fear that they will push their loved one away
from them.
Fear that they are making a "mountain out of
a molehill."
Fear that their thoughts and feelings aren't really
valid.
Or any one of a number of reasons.
They may even be going from past experience.
Some bipolar supporters have tried to talk to their
loved ones in the past and it hasn't worked out, so
they stopped talking to them.
Maybe this is you.
Maybe you tried sharing your thoughts or feelings
with your loved one at some point and it didn't
work out exactly like you wanted it to, so you've
stopped talking to your loved one, too.
Maybe it's out of fear.
It could be for one of the reasons I listed.
Or it could be for another reason.
But whatever the reason, if you've stopped
talking to your loved one, then communications
have broken down...
And that's NOT good.
For you, or for them, for your relationship,
or for their bipolar disorder.
Maybe you just need to take a risk.
Try taking something simple.
And start with that.
Like making a suggestion.
For example...
Maybe you can offer an opinion on what
the two of you can do together this weekend
or something.
It's a start!
Then work up from there.
Eventually, you can rebuild the walls of your
communication and be able to share your
thoughts and feelings with your loved one again.
What do you think?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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