Bipolar? Be Patient and It Will Happen
Published: Tue, 07/28/09
Hi ,
How's it going for you today?
I actually have Jury Duty today so
I have to get going.
I seriously hope it doesn't drag on and
on because I have so many other things
to do--like volunteer tonight.
Anyway, you know about my goddaughter, right?
I probably talk about her a lot (but
that's because she's my goddaughter!).
Well, she is so curious, which is
probably common for her age.
She tries to get into everything.
But she is also so impatient, too!
She knows what she wants, and she
wants it NOW!
Well, that made me think about how
there are two kinds of people in this
world:
Those who are impatient (like my
goddaughter)...
And those who are patient.
Impatient people who like to read are
those who will jump to the end of the
book to see how it turns out, then go
back and finish the rest of the book.
Right, do you know someone like that?
I hate that! I couldn't do it.
Or someone who fast forwards through
a DVD just to see how the movie ends,
then goes back and watches it. Come on
now, that's beyond impatient to the absurd!
(I hope that's not you)
Well, when it comes to bipolar disorder,
there are those same two kinds of people.
When it comes to the patient ones, it kind
of reminds me of the line from that movie
"Field of Dreams," where he says, "Build
it and they will come."
Stability is like that.
Be patient, and it will come.
But let's talk about the impatient ones first.
The impatient ones are like my goddaughter.
They know what they want (stability, of
course).
And they want it NOW!
There are two basic problems with this:
1. Stability is a process - it doesn't
happen overnight.
2. You have to work to gain stability -
it doesn't happen by itself.
People who don't recognize that stability is
a process are not willing to go through
the necessary steps and needed changes
to get there, and that is sad, because they
will have more episodes, and it will take
much, much longer for them to recover
(if they ever do).
Impatient people with bipolar disorder who
are not willing to do the necessary work
to gain it will never achieve stability because
they are probably lazy and unproductive -
and stability is not something that someone
else can do for you; you have to do it for
yourself.
Impatient people with the disorder will also
have problems with relationships and at
home on top of problems with their disorder,
because their impatience will carry over into
all other areas of their life.
They will often find themselves alone,
whereas a person trying to gain stability who
realizes the value of a good strong support
system will be better off than they are.
Impatience pushes people away, even
alienates them, and you need people to
gain stability.
In my courses/systems, I discuss how important
it is to be patient with bipolar disorder and
to understand that stability does not happen
overnight.
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Impatient people have a much,
much harder time reaching stability
than patient people do.
Patient people know how to wait
for things (like the "build it and
they will come" thing).
A patient supporter is the best
supporter because they know how
to "wait out" their loved one's episodes.
And that is a very, very difficult
thing to do, as you know.
When both the supporter and the
loved one with bipolar disorder are
patient, they are an unbeatable team!
When two people together are fighting
this serious disorder, there is a much
greater chance for stability than if one
person were trying to fight it alone.
Your role as a supporter is so important,
especially in encouraging your loved one.
And sometimes your patience may be tried,
but if you can conquer that, it will make
such a difference!
If you have bipolar disorder, and you can be
patient with your progress, little steps will
lead to greater steps, and eventually you
will become stable.
A lot of it has to do with your attitude.
A positive attitude will go far in helping
you to be patient.
Whereas a negative attitude just feeds
into impatience.
I would much rather be a patient person
than an impatient one.
What about you?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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