Bipolar? Consider the Source
Published: Mon, 07/27/09
Hi ,
I hope you're having a good day.
I was recently talking to a woman
whose mother was in a bipolar
episode.
At first I felt real sorry for this
woman, because I know what she
was up against.
But then she started being real
critical of her mom.
Then I felt sorry for her mom!
I mean, I remember when my mom
was in her really bad, like her worst
ever, episode in 2004...
I would get so mad at her because
she would scream and yell at me
and call me names and everything.
My mom was critical of me, too,
and would say things she never
even remembered saying during
the episode.
Now, that didn't mean that they
would hurt me any less, whether
she remembered them or not, or
that they would make me any less
mad, but I couldn't be critical of
her, because she was in an episode.
And that's what I want to talk to
you about.
In my courses/systems, I talk about
not taking things personally.
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Well, this is sort of like that.
It's called:
CONSIDER THE SOURCE.
Like this woman who I was talking
to, when she got critical of her
mom in an episode, she wasn't
considering the source.
If she had, maybe she wouldn't
have been so critical.
Her mom probably said some
pretty bad things, I'm sure, just
like my mom did (probably like
your loved one does when they're
in an episode)...
But you can't fault them when
you consider the source.
Just ask yourself:
Would they ever do or say those
things if they WEREN'T in an
episode?
So...
CONSIDER THE SOURCE.
When your loved one is complaining...
Ranting and raving at you...
Calling you names...
Accusing you of things...
Saying any other kinds of things
that aren't true...
CONSIDER THE SOURCE...
Because you know they're in an
episode.
You know they aren't themselves.
You know they wouldn't normally
behave this way...
Or say or do these things.
So you need to (like I say in my
courses/systems) NOT take it
personally, and...
CONSIDER THE SOURCE.
Consider that these things are
coming from a sick person who is
in a bipolar episode.
If they were being said or done by
someone else other than your
loved one...
With any other kind of illness...
Would you take it this personally?
Would you be as hurt?
Would you be as critical?
Would you be as unsympathetic?
Or would you...
CONSIDER THE SOURCE?
Try to remember these things and to
look at your loved one as suffering
from an illness they can't control the
next time they go into a bipolar
episode.
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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