Bipolar? Accepting Imperfections
Published: Sat, 09/26/09
Hi ,
How are you?
I hope you're doing well.
I want to tell you about a
woman I read about.
This woman was so obsessed
with perfection that she literally
made herself sick.
The problem was, in her eyes,
her body was fat.
Every time she looked in the mirror,
she saw herself as fat.
Now, that didn't make it true, it's
just the way she saw herself.
She would read magazines and
want to be as thin and perfect as
the models in the magazines.
She wanted a perfect body.
So she practically starved herself
to get one.
There is such a thing as losing too
much weight, however, and/or losing
it in the wrong way.
Instead of simply eating a healthy
diet and losing weight slowly like
she should have, she just stopped
eating almost altogether.
She did drink water, however, and
lots of it.
The water only flushed out needed
nutrients, though.
The next thing she knew, she was in
the hospital with an almost fatal blood
pressure and loss of electrolytes in
her body.
She was down to 95 pounds.
But she still thought she was fat.
In the hospital, they had to give her
several bags of fluids to get her blood
pressure back up.
She was very weak, and very sick.
The problem was not in her body, it
was in her mind.
She wanted to be perfect, and almost
died in the process.
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Imperfection is a fact of life.
It's hard to accept our own imperfections,
much less someone else's.
This woman became obsessed with a
perfect body.
You know I work out a lot, and I see
men all the time who are trying to do
the same thing.
Instead of just accepting that they aren't
Superman, they try and try to "buff up"
not for healthy reasons, but for personal
reasons.
Like this woman, they are unhappy with
their bodies.
They think that if they just work out
enough, they will have "six-pack abs"
and all the rest, and then their life will
be perfect.
That's the wrong way to approach it,
though.
It's one thing to try to improve yourself.
It's quite another thing if your motivation
is to be perfect.
Sometimes it's hard for a supporter of a
loved one with bipolar disorder to accept
their own limitations.
They want to be the perfect supporter.
In my courses/systems, I talk about what
makes a good supporter. But never do I
say that you have to be perfect at it.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11
SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.com
HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.net
All you can do is be the best supporter
you can be, and accept that you're not
going to be perfect.
No one is.
If you're looking for the magic formula
that tells you how to be the perfect
supporter, you won't find one.
But if you can accept your own
imperfections, it will be easier to
accept your loved one's imperfections.
No matter how much they try or what
they do, your loved one will never be
the perfect bipolar survivor, either.
There's an expression that says, "It's
ok to strive for perfection, as long as
you accept that you will never arrive
there."
If you accept your loved one as they
are, understanding that they are trying
their best to recover, things will be
much easier for you.
Just don't expect them to be perfect.
And don't expect yourself to be perfect,
either.
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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