A Bipolar Person? Why this is wrong
Published: Tue, 04/13/10
Hi ,
How's it going?
Hope you are doing well.
I was talking to a random person the other
day, and they asked what I did for a living.
So I told them about my company, and
about the fact that it is based on helping
people who have bipolar disorder and
their supporters.
She then looked at me and said, "Oh, yeah,
my aunt is bipolar."
That really irritated me.
It wasn't the fact that her aunt happened to
have bipolar disorder that irritated me, or
even that she mentioned it.
It was her wording.
As far as I'm aware, her aunt isn't the
personification of bipolar disorder.
There is probably more to her aunt's life
than just bipolar disorder.
And she certainly doesn't need to be
defined by bipolar.
Now, I'm sure that this lady didn't mean
to offend me, so I just said back to her,
"Oh, your aunt has bipolar disorder?"
Somehow I doubt she caught on.
Sometimes there is not much we can do to
fix other people's mistakes.
But we can fix our own.
And sometimes, like in this situation, it
happens to be as easy as changing our
wording.
Our loved ones aren't bipolar; they have
bipolar.
Can you see the difference?
Let's say you have bipolar disorder.
It's bad enough dealing with the label
already.
It means people look at you differently
and act differently around you.
It means you can't get certain jobs and
have a harder time taking on the ones you
can get.
It means you have to have people to
support you, which you are most likely
grateful for; but it'd be nice to not
absolutely need them.
At least not in that way.
But then on top of the label already being
bad enough, let's say that you had it worse.
Let's say that you didn't just have bipolar
disorder.
Let's say that you are bipolar.
So not only are you the person who has
the problem, you are also the cause of the
problem.
That would really stink, wouldn't it?
To know that it was your own fault that
you are in the situation you are in?
And then, there would be no way to escape
from the symptoms, because the symptoms
are you.
You'd never get any relief.
You'd never have any hope for recovery.
You'd never know what it felt like to not
be in a manic or depressed episode.
And depending on how you look at it, if
you were bipolar disorder, you would
probably be responsible for other people's
pain as well.
That is a thought that I don't even want
to think about.
Can you imagine what it must be like to
be bipolar disorder?
I can't.
So why on earth would we call our loved
ones bipolar disorder?
Or, those of you that have bipolar disorder,
why would you do this to yourself?
It's like adding insult to injury.
It's bad enough having bipolar disorder
without making it worse by labeling it
wrongly.
And people don't do that with other
diseases and disorders.
You don't hear someone saying "I am
cancer," or "she is cancer."
You don't hear anyone saying "I am
diabetes," or "he is diabetes."
For that matter, you don't even hear
anyone saying "I am high cholesterol,"
or "he is high cholesterol."
So why do we say "she is bipolar?"
Next time you start to say that, stop
yourself and correct yourself.
Start to say "he has bipolar disorder"
instead.
It is a small change.
But it will make all the difference in the
world.
What do you think of that?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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