Top Thing a Bipolar Supporter Can Do For their Loved One
Published: Wed, 03/31/10
Hi ,
How's your day going?
I hope it is a good one.
Have you ever wondered if there was a
single thing you could do to make recovery
easier for your loved one?
Well I'm certainly not going to claim
that there is a cure-all, but there is
something you can do to make things
easier on your loved one as they work on
recovery.
Wondering what I'm talking about?
Consistency.
When a person has bipolar disorder, it can
seem like nothing in life is consistent.
After all, even their moods aren't!
Can you imagine what that must feel like?
If we can be that one consistent thing in
their life, wouldn't we want to be?
If we can provide any form of consistency
in their life, wouldn't we want to?
Of course we would!
Now the real question is: how?
How can we provide consistency in our
loved one's world, when everything else
seems so hectic?
Well, one of the ways we can do so is to
stay calm when we are responding to their
different moods, and even their crisis
situations.
The more we can regulate our own moods,
the more we can help them learn to
regulate theirs.
After all, most of us learn by example.
Not to mention that if we can regulate our
own moods, then they will know ahead of
time how we will react to things.
Believe it or not, this can make all the
difference in the world.
If we can be a constant source of calmness,
while still being a source of reason and
encouragement, then they will know that
we are going to be a source of help no
matter what.
The calmer we are, the more we can help
them through their struggles, and they are
aware of this also (even if they don't
understand it on a conscious level.)
Another thing we can do to be consistent
is to be a constant source of reason for
them.
After all, when they are in a manic state,
they cannot provide their own reason.
But if we provide it for them, then they
know what to expect from us the next time.
Then they will know that they can come
to us when they are not sure that they can
trust their own judgment.
This is crucial for them.
After all, they have to have someone to go
to when they are manic and cannot think
clearly on their own accord.
Part of their recovery process is to learn to
go to someone for advice, even when they
are manic.
If we can be that person that they trust to
go to, and we can follow through with
practical and sound advice, then we can
truly help them through their recovery.
Another thing we can do to be consistent
is to constantly be a source of
encouragement. This is true all of the time,
but especially when they are depressed.
That is to say, they need encouragement
the most when they are depressed.
But that is not the only time that they need
encouragement.
Also, if we can provide them with
encouragement all of the time, then they
will know that they can come to us when
they need it.
Wouldn't it be great if our loved ones
knew that they could come to us when they
needed encouragement?
That is most likely to happen if they are
familiar with our encouragement.
And they will be most familiar with our
encouragement if they hear it a lot.
Now, our encouragement needs to change,
of course, when they are in different
moods.
After all, the same encouragement won't be
effective when they are depressed as it was
when they were manic.
The same encouragement won't be as
effective when they are finally in a
normal state as it was when they were in
a mood swing.
When they are manic, we can encourage
them to come to us or someone else they
trust so that we can act as a sound mind
for them.
We can also encourage them to try to
control their actions no matter how they
may feel while manic.
When they are depressed, we can
encourage them to get up and do something,
despite how they may feel.
We can encourage them to keep going,
even though it may seem like there is no
point in doing so.
We can even encourage them by reminding
them that there is still things worth living
for.
When they are in a normal state, we can
encourage them to follow their recovery
plan so that they can stay in that state for
longer than they might have otherwise.
Regardless of what state they are in,
encouragement is a thing that can be
helpful in their lives, especially if it is a
constant thing.
Consistency is a thing that can help our
loved ones in their recovery process, and
we can show them that consistency by
encouraging them, being a voice of reason,
and staying calm.
Wouldn't you want to be the one constant
thing in their life?
What do you think?
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Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave
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