Borderline Supporters – Take Your Life Back
Published: Tue, 07/22/08
Hi ,
Hope your day is going well.
Today I want to talk about something that
borderline supporters may not necessarily think
about: taking your life back.
You spend so much time trying to figure out your
loved one and walking around on eggshells,
wondering what is coming next...
You spend so little time thinking about your
own life, or yourself, your own needs. And you
do have needs. Maybe you just haven't considered
them for a long time.
In my main course and resource below, I ask you to
consider your own needs as well as your loved one's
needs:
SUPPORTING A LOVED ONE WITH BORDERLINE?
http://www.borderlinecentral.com/report/
NEED HELP EXPLAINING BORDERLINE PERSONALITY?
http://www.borderlinecentral.com/explainingborderline/
You do have your own needs, or have you become
so caught up in your loved one's needs and THEIR
behavior, that you've forgotten one very important
thing:
YOURSELF!
Well, I've only got one thing to say to that:
TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK!
Let me ask you some questions:
· Have you been afraid of your loved one?
· Have you been afraid of what they would
do if you tried to do something on your own?
· Would they be angry at you?
· Would they be clingy?
· Would they demand that you not go?
· Would they cause problems for you if you
did go?
· Would they give you the "silent treatment"
when you got back?
· Would they "punish" you?
· Would they withhold their affection from you?
· Do you tell yourself that it's not worth it?
TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK!
You have rights. You have the right to do things without
your loved one.
You can go out without your loved one, and you should
not feel guilty about it, or be afraid of repercussions.
You should set boundaries and limits. You should tell
them that you should be able to go out just like they
do. And you should tell them that you should be able
to do this without them getting mad or any of the
other things I named above.
And then you should talk about consequences of them
doing any of the things I named above.
TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK!
Don't let your loved one dictate to you what your
behavior should or should not be!
You were your own person before you met them!
Why should you have to stop being that person
just because you are in a relationship with a
person who has borderline personality disorder?
Dr. Mason and Randi Kreger, the authors of
"Stop Walking on Eggshells," tell you to
memorize the 3 C's and the 3 G's:
I didn't Cause it.
I can't Control it.
I can't Cure it.
Get off their back.
Get out of their way.
Get on with your own life.
See the last G?
Get on with your own life.
In other words:
TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK!
Your Friend,
Dave
===>> Great Resources For You <===
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Get More Help On Borderline Personality Disorder Don't forget to take a look
through the different programs I've put together... each one is designed to
help you with a different area of borderline personality disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.borderlinecentral.com/offers.shtml