Borderline? Can You Do It For the Long Haul?
Published: Mon, 08/24/09
Hi ,
Hope you're doing ok today.
Do you remember the old fable
about the tortoise and the hare?
Some say that's where we get the
expression, "Slow and steady wins
the race."
But I was thinking about the hare in
that story.
He started out of the gate real quick,
but then he just didn't follow through.
So I want to ask you:
Whatever you're doing, can you do it
for the long haul?
Because those people who are like the
hare, can't.
Or for whatever reason, they just don't.
Maybe they get discouraged.
Maybe they feel like it's too hard for
them.
Maybe they can't deal with the inevitable
setbacks.
Maybe their negative feelings take over.
There could be many reasons why people
who support someone with borderline
personality disorder don't "slow and steady
win the race."
You start out at the gate with a diagnosis
of borderline personality disorder.
Then you're told you have to be on
medication for it, and that you have to
be on that medication for the rest of
your life.
And that's hard for some people to take.
But then they do take the medication,
and it makes them feel better.
Unfortunately, some people, when they
start to feel better, they "drop out of
the race," and don't want to take their
medication any more, not realizing
that it's the medication that is making
them feel so good.
And when someone with borderline
personality disorder goes off their
medication, there is bound to be a
setback.
Then they're right back to the beginning
of the race, and so are you.
Any progress that has been made can be
kind of "canceled out."
And that can get very frustrating for
the supporter.
In my main course and resource below,
I talk about how setbacks are inevitable,
but that you can't give up hope.
SUPPORTING A LOVED ONE WITH BORDERLINE?
http://www.borderlinecentral.com/report/
NEED HELP EXPLAINING BORDERLINE PERSONALITY?
http://www.borderlinecentral.com/explainingborderline/
You can't go from bad (worst) to good
(great) in one leap.
Because some things take time, and being
steady over that time.
And you may not see the results at first -
like a diet.
But if you stick with it, you will see
the results.
Recovery from borderline personality
disorder does mean a change in
lifestyle, to be sure.
But you have to maintain that lifestyle
change over a period of time in order
to recover.
For example, therapy for someone with
the disorder is extensive, and long-term.
If your loved one is not willing to go
to therapy, there isn't much chance of
them changing.
Because they first have to acknowledge
that they have the disorder...
Then they have to acknowledge that
they need help...
Then they have to be willing to get
that help.
Only when they really want to change
will your loved one stick with their
treatment.
Are they in it for the long haul?
Because you can't carry it all by
yourself.
Remember, you aren't the one with
borderline personality disorder.
Like they say with some things,
"They didn't get this way overnight,
and they're not going to change
overnight."
So it's going to mean some real
patience on your part.
The problem is that we live in a
"right now" kind of society.
Fast food restaurants.
TV dinners.
Credit cards.
People are used to getting things
quickly.
But stability isn't something that
can be gotten quickly.
Yes, you have to do some things
that you don't want to do.
But it's kind of like putting something
on layaway at Christmas time, then
making payments on it, until you
eventually get it.
You do that because whatever you're
buying is worth it to you - is worth
the wait to get it.
Well, stability is like that.
Everything positive you do to get it,
every "payment" you make towards
recovery is worth the wait.
You just have to keep doing what
works.
And you need to do it over the long
haul, steadily.
Because slow and steady, in this case,
really does win the race.
And don't you think it's worth it?
Your Friend,
Dave
===>> Great Resources For You <===
Get Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter Want your own copy of these
daily bipolar emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/register3
Get More Help On Borderline Personality Disorder Don't forget to take a look
through the different programs I've put together... each one is designed to
help you with a different area of borderline personality disorder whether
you have it or you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http://www.borderlinecentral.com/offers.shtml